Mindful Moments Blog
Mindful Moments Blog
Emotional Education Helps Woman Finds Self-Love After Childhood Accident
by Guest Author
After being in a traumatic accident, I viewed the world differently than every other eleven-year-old. My brain didn’t adapt as well as my body, and I wondered, "What's wrong with me?" Then, I found the one thing that was lacking in my childhood: emotional education. Here's my journey.
Mindful Moments Blog
When Partners Disagree: Tools For Parenting On The Same Page
by Ashley Patek
Parenting disagreements are not uncommon, especially with so many different parenting ideologies out there. So, how can parents get on the same page?
Mindful Moments Blog
Is Attachment Parenting a Feminist Crutch?
by Suzanne Tucker
How we parent ... It’s a hot topic, full of judgment as evident in the recent TIME Magazine cover article “Are You Mom Enough.” It would seem the media likes this thing called the mommy wars. The controversy sells magazines and books, I suppose. But what does it do for us moms?
Mindful Moments Blog
Halloween 2020: A New Way To Celebrate
by Ashley Patek
While Halloween may look different this year, there are many ways that families can keep the spooky spirit and fun alive.
Mindful Moments Blog
Meltdowns Develop Your Child's Brain When Met With Connection; Punishment Doesn't Work
by Ashley Patek
Toddlers are one of the most authentic creatures on the planet, and also, arguably, the most misunderstood. On the surface, we see meltdowns, defiance, and limit testing. But there’s so much more than what meets the eye.
Mindful Moments Blog
5 Connection-Based Ways To Support Your Child Through Shyness
by Guest Author
Does your child seem slow to warm up or hesitant to jump into social situations? Here are 5 connection-based ways to support them through shyness (without muting their intuition or muddling their self-concept).
Mindful Moments Blog
A Parent's Guide: Meditate With Toddlers And Teens To Improve Emotional Intelligence And Resilience
by Ashley Patek
Even though today’s kids exhibit elevated levels of restlessness, stress, and anxiety, only 1.6% of children in the U.S. meditate. Here are the benefits of meditation on the developing brain and how parents can practice meditation with kids at every age.
Mindful Moments Blog
Teaching Academics and Social-Emotional Skills in the Montessori Classroom
by Ashley Patek
Emily Canibano, a Montessori teacher with a classroom of 16 students ranging in age from 1.2 to 5.5 years, was looking for a way to teach social-emotional skills in her classroom, both in feeling emotions and in the safe expression of them.
Mindful Moments Blog
This Sucks and I Am Drowning, and Hey, How Are You Doing?
by Stephanie Sprenger
When my kids were babies, I didn’t want to read articles titled, “10 Ways to Make Bathtime More Enriching.” I wanted to read about other moms who were fishing craisin-speckled feces out of the tub with a bath toy while swearing and silently weeping.
I didn’t want to read, “5 Screen-Free Restaurant Activities for Your Kids.” I wanted another mom to tell me that she burned with resentment when the kids needed her to take them potty just as the food arrived because of course they were both girls and she was the only parent who ever had to take kids to the potty in public.
I didn’t even glean anything useful from “The Bedtime Routine That Will 100% Work for You No Matter Your Child’s Age, Your Personality Type, or Your Life Situation.” But I did appreciate that other moms put earbuds in and sat in the hallway drinking wine while their kids sobbed explosively from their tiny toddler beds.
I rolled my eyes at “How to Know Whether Your Kids Are Well Rounded” and gobbled up essays where moms disclosed that they had their kids in daycare even though they weren’t working. I wanted to read that I wasn’t messing up my kids’ lives because I sucked at crafts or said bad words or craved alone time.
I wanted to read that other moms also preferred their children in small doses.
That their mornings were a disaster and that they couldn’t seem to stick with chore charts and that their kid went through a biting phase too but that the older toddler who got in their kid’s face at the play area totally had that shoulder bite coming.
Now that I have a tween and a teenager, I am equally disinterested in “Communication Strategies Guaranteed to Work for Your Teen;” “Boundaries 101 for Moms of Teenage Girls;” “Read These 42 Books To Make Sure Your Kid Has Healthy Relationships, “ and “5 Ways to Tell If Your Kid is A Basketcase.”
I do not want to hear that the struggles we are dealing with now mean my child is going to “find her people” in college and change the world, even if I secretly believe this deep in my heart (please, please let it be true).
Here’s what I want to read.
I want to hear from other parents that this era of their lives sucks too.
I want to read the stories of moms who cry in the shower and feel like they are having panic attacks at Target when they see a kid who bullied their kid at school.
I want to read about how they feel like screaming in people’s faces until their throat is raw.
I want them to tell me that they understand how hard it is to discern when to advocate and when to quietly retreat.
I want to read real, gritty stories about how messed up society is and how we aren’t the crazy ones.
I want to hear your gut-wrenching story and I want you to tell me that you see yourself in my words.
There is no manual.
I want to be reminded that there is no one "right" parenting manual. There wasn’t when my kids were small, and there isn’t now.
Bring me your stories about how worried you are about your kids. Maybe you think they are liars or lazy or hoarders or basic or too weird or too much or you’re terrified they are going to lose themselves or get swallowed whole.
Tell me about how you cried at their final concert because your kid was being bullied and decided to quit the band.
Tell me how angry you are, that it isn’t fair and it isn’t right and I’ll tell you you aren’t crazy and you can tell me I’m not either.
All I have ever wanted in this world of writing and reading about parenthood is to read the real stuff.
The spaces for mothers to write honestly about motherhood are being rapidly displaced, making way for “reported essays,” where experts give you something helpful to share so people don’t think you’re a navel-gazing basketcase with poor boundaries because you want to write a story that has essentially no point except this: This sucks, I am drowning, and hey, how are you doing?
I guess that was the beauty of the (gag, don’t make me say it) “mommy blogging” era, a time when really, our writing had no point. It existed only to exist, to be read, to land on soft ground where another mom would say, “God, that feels like me.”
I know there are a lot of uplifting resources out there.
And, if you’ve shared them with me, thank you. Of course, I want to read and learn and have hope and be strong and do better.
In fact, a bunch of stuff that I said I didn’t want to hear up there, I actually appreciate and attempt to integrate. Really.
But you get the point. Sometimes, I just want to write with no solution required and no problems solved.
And maybe, sometimes, you just want to read with no solution outlined, no problems solved, and no learning or new skills acquired.
So much has changed since the days when I gritted my teeth on the floors of public restrooms trying to shove chubby legs through pull-up holes and cover the sensor on the back of the toilet that scared the Bejeezus out of my kids.
But so much about me hasn’t changed.
The kind of parent I am.
The kind of writing I do.
The type of people I want to talk to. It’s my dogs, guys. The people I want to talk to are like my dogs.
So tell me, how the hell are you doing with this parenting era, whatever it looks like for you? I’ll listen. No “how-to” lists, bullet points, or expert commentary is required.
Need some inspiration? We got 'ja.
Print this and remember the "AND"... we can feel overwhelmed and BE ENOUGH, all at the very same time.
Reparent Yourself
Intergenerational healing is about progress... not perfection.
By understanding and embracing your inner child with kindness, you become resilient, improve your emotional well-being, and form a deeper connection with yourself and others.
If you would like guidance and support in your reparenting journey, please take a moment to explore the Reparent Yourself Masterclass Bundle.
Lifetime Access to 20 Interactive Courses, Guided Meditations, Healing Movement, and Other Transformative Resources. The Reparent Yourself Masterclass Bundle is available at 94% Off Savings for a limited time.
Mindful Moments Blog
Breaking The Cycle: A Shift from Punitive to Positive Parenting
by Ashley Patek
A shift from punitive punishment to positive parenting. One mama shares her story of breaking the generational cycle of spanking to connection-based childrearing.
Mindful Moments Blog
by Suzanne Tucker
What if I was done? Complete. Leaving me incomplete. Longing to be a work in progress. Round around the edges. Potential yet realized.
Mindful Moments Blog
Morning Meetings and Connecting a Classroom
by Ashley Patek
A the school counselor shares how her school transformed its classroom culture by using SnuggleBuddies plush toys to teach students about their emotions.
Mindful Moments Blog
When Your Child Says "I Hate You!"
by Guest Author
When your child says “I hate you!” you might find yourself getting defensive or you may feel the urge to assert control over the situation. The key to getting to the root of the challenge is to look beyond the hurtful words to figure out what’s going on for them emotionally. What are they really saying?
Mindful Moments Blog
Wholeheartedly Accepting and Supporting Neurodiverse Families
by Ashley Patek
What is neurodiversity and how do we move from awareness to acceptance to advocating for in small everyday moments?
Mindful Moments Blog
6 Ways To Deal With A Public Tantrum (Or Prevent Them Altogether)
by Ashley Patek
A public tantrum doesn’t have to be a deal-breaker, but rather a learning moment in the broad scope of a day together. We can let children know with our words and actions that, wherever we are, emotions are safe to feel. Sometimes we can decrease the likelihood of a meltdown. Here are six helpful factors to consider:
Mindful Moments Blog
Manage Your Emotions, And Your Child's Too: Interview With Suzanne Tucker
by Ashley Patek
You can actually be yelling at your child and be mindful. If you notice that you're yelling... pause, and celebrate. You say to yourself, 'I'm yelling, and I noticed I'm yelling' and then take a deep breath. Now you have some power. to do something different, but not if you're busy beating yourself up.
Mindful Moments Blog
How to Handle Sibling Rivalry During Quarantine
by Ashley Patek
In a time of social distancing, tension can elevate between siblings. These 7 tips can help to tame sibling rivalry during quarantine.
